Betrayal

Its been a month since I am home for vacations. The flash news for you guys is that I have nt yet called shreya or picked her call. She has been calling me all day long but i have been keeping the phone ringing. Dont ask me why but i want to get out of this relationship. Was it a one night stand for me? Was I using her? By the look of things that have passed. It sure looks that way. All these questions ran through my mind the whole day. What the hell would she think about me? I was using her fo that one night. Am I that kind of a person Or is it NEHA? Is she still tormenting my mind? I should have given a fucking thought about it before I made out with shreya. Right now I am trying to escape and giving stupid justification which is even hard for me to believe, then how the hell can i expect shreya to fall for it.

Should I talk to her again or Is it too late for that? Till now she might have got a clear picture about me. If u ask her to explain about me in a word then "SCOUNDREL" would be the least she would use. I send her a message the next day. Dont wana disclose what I send but that was the last I had heard from her. Shreya's chapter closed. Easy said and done or Is it???

With all those questions in mind, I returned to college for my next semester. She was not the only one who had some asking to do. Two of my closest friends knew about this relationship. One wa Aditya my room mate and the other was Anjana, my best friend. Have nt yet told you people about her. She is the one with whom I share all the happenings in my college and home. She is all in one, my friend , my P.A and everything. Dont have words to explain about her. Can say she knows more about me and my family than I know. Shocking??? Even I was!!! She along with Aditya had an important role to play in my relationship with shreya. She was the mediator for me. So obviously she had loads of questions to ask and I did owe her an explanation. I did talk to her about it but it wa least satisfactory. I expected that! But there was nothing she could do to change my mind, she knew that so she never tried. Even Aditya was pized with my attitude. They came to a conclusion that I dont value relationship and love. Some where in the back of mind I knew that i was gona pay for what i did. Somewhere in this four years I did. Anjana always called me a KID. I just proved her right with my kiddish attitude.

In the times to come, the most difficult part for me in college was to come face to face with shreya. It was so very difficult for me to look in to her face. It just made me pathetic. She would boldly look in to my face which would make me realize that I was a big time looser. By the time it was a talking point in college that I broke up with shreya. These people need something to talk over an evening coffee.What better to talk about than there friends break up. They would make up there own stories as to what would be the reason behind it. Can say yet another chapter in my o called fucked up life.........